Bad hair day? You’re not the only one. Trust. While going through my blog the other day, I started coming across some other blog posts that I don’t think you even knew existed. I get messages from ladies who say that they wish their hair journey is as simple as mine is. Mine’s been far from it. And as a woman, I know how frustrating it could be when you have no idea what the hell you’re doing with your hair or in my case, what my hair is doing on its own haha.
The truth: I still get bad hair days. I just seem to get them less often now that I’m further on in my hair story and I’ve gotten used to dealing with them too. I wasn’t always at this stage and along with the Being Natural posts I’m writing, I’d like to add some where I re-share with you those specific times my hair drove me crazy, made me almost cry and secretly wish for someone else’s hair. I use the term ‘re-share’ because I’ve already written them, they’re just hiding in my blog archive.
Here’s the first:
Good Days and Bad Days
Written on June 15th, 2011. Fully natural for less than a month.
The past few days, I think I was going through my first slump. Which is
okay, as it happens every so often. I just didn’t expect it to happen so
soon after going natural. But hey, it has and there will be more slumps
just as there’ll be highs. Being natural doesn’t change that. I’m a
girl. And that’s just what happens, natural or relaxed, weaved or
braided, there are gonna be days I don’t feel so hot. So I’ve realised I
shouldn’t be “blaming” my funk on my natural hair. I’m better now, I’m
seeing that my hair is growing…no it’s not going to grow to shoulder
length overnight so I just have to work with what I have now. It will
grow. And it will grow when it wants to. I can help it, but maybe my
hair has her own mind. I used to read stuff like that and thought that
person was crazy but seriously though, “she” did tell me she didn’t want
to get relaxed anymore. That was very very clear. She’d had enough and I
listened. So maybe that’s what people mean by listening to your hair.
If it’s limp, it’s telling me it’s damaged. If it’s dry, she’s thirsty.
If my scalp is itchy, I need to put some oil treatment (learnt that
yesterday!). I think the best way to get to know my hair is by trying
different things and seeing how it’ll react to the different things. If
it’s softer after shampoo X then, she likes shampoo X. Is it’s dry and
itchy after conditioner Y then she doesn’t like conditioner Y. I
shouldn’t force things, but give everything I can a chance, and compare.
And about the whole feeling like I’m doing too many things to my hair,
only I can control that. I know my schedule and how much time and energy
is the maximum I can put into my hair…not those girls on blogs. They
have different lives, some busier, some less busy. So I need to do what I
want to do along with what my hair wants me to do. It is still new, so I
need to pay even more attention now. I need to learn her habits and
eventually be able to predict when she’ll start feeling dry or dirty
etc. It’s like a baby really. In the beginning, you don’t know its
personality. How often he or she will want to feed. But that baby will
cry…them scream til you give it what it wants. And eventually, you get
the hang of it and know that baby usually gets hungry between 3 and 4
am or baby usually goes through 8 nappies a day or no matter what I do,
baby won’t be sleepy at 11pm. So I think that’s how I’m gonna have to do
it. Try a product and see…try a regimen and see…and adjust it
accordingly.
I woke up this morning thinking, “what are you getting so impatient
about?? You knew your hair was gonna be short and it’s not gonna
magically grow to shoulder length in a week.” I was so itchy to BC, and
loved the first couple weeks, I just realised I have to take it as it
comes. There are gonna be bad days, as with all hairstyles and I need
to focus more on the reasons why I decided to chop now rather than
later and enjoy my new “privileges” like wearing bold make up and
earrings etc. Like I said, I knew I’d have a slump, just didn’t expect
it this soon, I’m not even a month in yet! There will be a day when I
can finally wear my hair flowers and accessories with confidence, the
headbands too and can finally do twist outs etc! Until then, I’m gonna
embrace it all. The good, the bad and the not so hot days 🙂
