The Worst Parenting Advice

So there I was, 14 weeks after I gave birth, tired but sleepless. Reason for the disturbed sleep? Well, I have a son whom I still needed to breastfeed. I usually went back to sleep but he was quite distracted in this session so I became more and more awake trying to get him to focus on the boob. It’s actually quite funny to me that when I couldn’t sleep while preggers, I’d go into the nursery for some peace and quiet and troll Pinterest for even more baby articles and décor ideas. And now, I’m writing this post in the nursery while he and his dad sleep peacefully in our room. Sigh.

This leads me to finally vent about the worst piece of advice I’ve gotten about being a new mom: sleep when the baby sleeps. ARGHHHHH. It’s advice given by one of two people: one who has never had children and repeats it because it’s the thing to say or one who has had babies, but had them so long ago they’ve forgotten allll of the other things that still need to be done in a day that requires you to be awake for. ‘Like what?’ I hear you ask. Let’s just start with the bare necessity of ummm, eating. To eat, you need to cook. To cook, you need dishes. And before you know it, your baby is awake from his nap and you – still sleepless.

Then there’s laundry. They’re the tiniest humans but the amount of laundry you’re going to be doing is beyond comprehension. Just because you aren’t managing to wear fresh clothes everyday (hello spit ups, pee splashes and doodoo accidents), doesn’t mean you can or should let your baby stay in the same manky clothes. If you’re lucky, you’ll only need to change him like once a day. HA!

If you’re fortunate like me, and have a self-employed husband with relatively flexible hours, you could have a quickie shower whilst he ‘babysits’. Unfortunately, the majority of moms don’t have such luxury. And you can’t exactly shower with an attached newborn on your hip now can you? And there you have it, the reason why so many moms go a day (or two) without showering. This isn’t a Disney movie where the neighbourhood birds and squirrels sneak into your house to cheerily help you with your housework. So you have to decide; sleep (when the baby sleeps)…or…get your house, and yourself, into some kind of order, when the baby sleeps.

This is when that pondering emoji would come in very handy.

What’s the worst advice you’ve received about new mommyhood?

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8 Comments

  1. Zamakhuze Zikalala
    February 9, 2017 / 5:53 am

    Lol shame man, I was given the same advise as well, it does work a little when you have someone helping you. I was fortunate to have other women around me during the time of my son’s birth so I wasn’t responsible for all the housework etc, I was mostly only responsible for him and he was well behaved at most time when he was awake.

    • Aisha O
      February 24, 2017 / 10:09 am

      I definitely think when you have a gang of women around you, you’re much better off. I also had help and my hubby was amazing but there’s only so much he was able to do. I know that if I was at home (Tanzania) I would’ve had countless family members tending to me. All’s good though 🙂

  2. MrsFF
    January 30, 2017 / 9:56 pm

    Ha ha ha we all get that advise but it doesn’t work all sadly. I always tell people please do what works for you. If it is co-sleeping then so be it . Because you need your sleep to remain sane. But yes I spent baby’s sleeping time doing things I can’t do while she was awake like laundry and bath and actually eat 🙂

    • Aisha O
      January 31, 2017 / 10:45 am

      Eat! What a fundamental thing I had to do while he was asleep, because breastfeeding made me constantly hungry. Co-sleeping has never worked for me 🙁

  3. January 23, 2017 / 7:15 pm

    Lol, not a mom yet but I always had my doubt if the “Sleep when the baby is asleep works”!

    And soon when the baby will be picky on his food some may just say, ” force him, just push him, do not let him run you”. Like really? I just hate that cuz if you push obvious he will hate the whole process of eating and even the food too. Some moms should find easier ways to handle kids and also enjoying their motherhood without pressure.

    Love,
    http://www.oliviazjournal.com

    Olivia

    • Aisha O
      January 24, 2017 / 3:56 pm

      Hey Olivia, some peeps do swear by it. It just hasn’t worked for me. And that you’ll find when you become a mom, you’ll definitely only follow about 30% of the advice you receive lol

  4. Lo
    January 23, 2017 / 3:09 pm

    Well…I got that advice too and thought it was ridiculous. BUT…I know understand what it means. My boys wakes every hour or 2 every night for the boob. By morning I am so exhausted and have to start my ‘to-do’ list which I NEVER complete,let alone do half of it…thats housework. So when takes his naps during the day, I found that napping with him on some of the naps with him left me feeling recharged. So I had the energy to look after him and attempt to do chores. Took me 3month to try it out and I am glad I did. To me it has been one of the best advices

    • Aisha O
      January 24, 2017 / 3:53 pm

      Hey Lo, thanks for commenting. Thing is I’m one of those peeps who can’t fall asleep whenever so I guess I’d you can, then great. Me, can’t 😢 😢 😢

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